“Jesus loves you, I don’t.”

September 9, 2007

Country singer Danielle Peck has penned some lyrics that you may want to ponder. The lyrics are as follows:

You say you’re doin’ better
For your sake I hope it’s true
I wish you well
But that’s all that I can do
Save your “I’m sorry’s”
Just leave ’em out the door
You can’t make me feel guilty anymore

You say I should stay with you
That Jesus forgives you
You pray I will, but I won’t
The difference is
Jesus loves you, I don’t

I know it sounds cruel
And it’s really not like me, but
You’ve put me in a place
I never thought I’d be
These tears I’m crying
Are just tears of goodbye
I hope you find someone else
Somewhere in your life
Somewhere in your life

I don’t wanna know you still want me
Don’t need to hear you can’t sleep
No I don’t, no I don’t

Here is the video:

This song was also remixed by techno artist Judy Torres, and can be sampled here.

Let’s ponder these lyrics together, especially if your a female. There are many ways to react to such words, especially those of “Jesus loves you, I don’t”. The modern evangelical Christian may be offended and feel Jesus’ love is being dumbed down and made lite of by such words. It may be thought, this phrase ought to be cherished as a message of truth, rather than loosely used for an ironic comeback by some girl who’s having a break-up fit with her pathetic boyfriend. On the other hand, many who aren’t Christians are probably sick and tired of being hit over the head with the cute phrase:


What type of love are we really conveying when we loosely chant this? This cliche is thrown around left and right by modern evangelicals as though we’re trying to make the gospel something which is easier to believe then it really is. The church must repent of using this mantra which seeks to prey off the inner most needs of the human soul in order to derive some type of reaction from the lost.

What the lost need is the real gospel which is Biblically laid out here. Here’s a fundamental truth we must learn once we understand God’s sovereignty in using His real gospel to save the lost: a difficult gospel is easy to believe, but an easy gospel is difficult to believe. Even when presented with the calmest and nicest voice, the real gospel is a difficult message to swallow. Yet it saves. And even if the easy to believe gospel is accepted by chance, it may not have even been the real gospel that was accepted!

The real gospel is a vampire slayer! It is a stake to the heart of truth about who we are, who God is, and our only hope in Jesus Christ. I know this is graphic language, but this is true. This is why Paul said, “I am not ashamed of the gospel for it is the power of God unto salvation.” The real gospel is a difficult gospel to accept, Nevertheless, it saves.

When we go around saying “Jesus loves you” what message are we really conveying? Perhaps, “If you ever need a spiritual hug, and Barney is no where to be found, then Jesus is there.” As the church, we are responsible for painting this false view of Christ in the eye’s of unbelievers. I take responsibility for this as well, and is why I am now trying to portray Jesus Christ in the correct biblical light. We’ve got to stop going around telling people “Oh, just in case you forgot after hearing it the first 1,000 times, Jesus loves you” and assume we’ve brought lasting hope to people’s lives.

Only the unsafe gospel message will bring true hope. We must share that there is hope against all possible hopes for our rebellion against God through Jesus Christ. Anyone who turns from sin and places their faith in Jesus Christ can be assured they are forgiven of infinite treason; and thus greatly loved. Yes John 3:16 says “God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten Son, so that all who believe in Him will have eternal life and not perish” but we can also deduce from this verse that all who do NOT believe will forever perish! Think about that for a minute. Let’s be about sharing the gospel message which will truly save souls. This is in hopes that God’s love, instead of His wrath, will be made known to those who repent of sin and have faith in Jesus Christ.

When we flippantly use phrases like “Jesus loves you”, the concept of God’s love becomes far too trivial, and the real beauty and worth of Jesus’ love becomes shielded from both unbelievers and believers alike. As I always like to point out: The gospel is NOT that Jesus loves you in spite of your sin, but that He loves us by doing something about it. The biblical gospel is that Jesus in fact hates you, unless you repent of your sin and turn to Him in faith and repentance. Then you will know you are right with God. Then you will know that God’s eternal wrath was diverted to Jesus Christ instead of you. Then you will know the real profound love that Christ has for you.

Jesus’ love is not cheap, it costs His own life. We should not share it with others as something cheap as we do with our “Jesus loves you” cliches. We should preach the real gospel and seek to find out whom in fact God does love. That is, whomever has their heart changed by the genuine gospel message.


Now specifically, I would like to look at the context of this song written by Danielle Peck. Within the lyrical content, it’s plain that this song is about a recent breakup. Maybe he cheated on her. But I’d like to focus on how the guy tries to guilt her with the “Jesus” card in hopes she’ll take him back. Again, the chorus goes…

You say I should stay with you
That Jesus forgives you
You pray I will, but I won’t
The difference is
Jesus loves you, I don’t”

Now notice, she seems to use the phrase “Jesus loves you, I don’t” in such a way which implies that NOT loving like Jesus IS an act of self-preservation! Now the question I have is this: “how in the world is it that we’ve gotten to the place where not loving like Jesus would become a good thing?” Or “why in the world is loving like Jesus such a huge hindrance?!”

But it’s no wonder why this is so when Jesus’ love has become so prostituted and dumbed down by modern evangelicals. When we think of Jesus being loving we think of this infatuated, smothering, stalker type of love which usually results in a restraining order. To love like Jesus must mean that I am to put up with everyone’s BS and lay down like a floor mat. Right?

But should we really view Jesus’ love like this? Let’s go the the B-I-B-L-E to find out. What a novel concept. I’ll make this very simple! Jesus says the greatest commandment is to love the Lord. Matthew 22:37 says, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” The second greatest commandment is like the first. Matthew 22:39, “And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.'” Notice the greatest commandment isn’t to be a people pleaser but to love God.

Therefore, loving like Jesus isn’t a hindrance after all. Don’t think, “I need to abandon Christ-like love if I’m going to really protect myself.” You’re only believing a lie if you actually think that Jesus wants you to be walked all over.

Why is this so? Well, if we’re to obey the greatest commandment and love God above all else, then we will honor God with even our relationships. Loving like Jesus actually keeps you out of danger. It actually protects you! Loving God and His commands is what will protect you the most in fact. If you seek to honor and please God with your life decisions, then you’ll cut off that which is not good for you. That includes closing doors unto better beginnings. Not apart from Christ, but because of Christ. This is living the greatest commandment.

Many people think the two greatest commandments are in reverse order; that we should please men above all we do. No, we should please God. He wants us to have healthy relationships with God loving people.

Note that in relationships we must be very selfless, as Christ was selfless with us. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is the blueprint by which both men and woman are to follow: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs…”

But nevertheless, if a guy pulls the “Jesus forgives me and you should too” card, then ladies make sure you respond this way, “Jesus forgives me too for not trusting Him more with my relationships.” Because remember, to really love God is to protect yourself from that which is not good for you. Then, build up your courage and firmly say “goodbye”. Make sure there is another guy present to kick your boyfriends ass if he starts to get aggressive.

This implies, however, that you are a Christian woman who has decided to grow up, mature, and desire a man who will be committed to Ephesians 5:25. Until then ladies, you’ll just have to keep repeating this song. I really hope you don’t though. 🙂

Curious about the real gospel and why Jesus really loves you? You will be shocked. It’s not because of you! Find out here.



  1. I never would have heard of this song if it was not for you (is that good or bad!!!). You are right on the money with your commentary about the statement ‘Jesus loves you’. I have only been to one church where I heard the pastor really explain what the gospel says about the love Jesus has for us. I am so thankful that I have come to the understanding of what God’s love is and how not to abuse it. God loves me, this I know!

  2. I kept hearing this song in the techno version on the radio. I thought it was a cool song and checked out who it was by. Then I found out that it was first a country song. I heard Thor Tolo on the radio talking about God’s love as an indispensable hug. I called up and said that “Jesus actually hates us unless we repent.” He said “Well, God loves the sinner but hates the sin” and went straight to the next caller before I could reply. It really makes me mad when Christians with public influence misrepresent the gospel!

  3. As I read over this post you wrote, I thought of several girls I know, and including myself at one time – maybe moreso in a lighter sense. Either way, I think your discernment in these relationships are correct and right on track, more specifically from the ladies’ perspective. Lies women believe can keep us trapped, particularly in relationships that are not good, not honoring to God. And we need someone, or something like this, to speak boldly and honestly, using Scripture, to help pull back the shades we may or may not know we are wearing. I think deep down, woman desire a man who will “love us as Christ has loved the church, giving himself up for it,” but we all too quickly believe the lies of “him not being out there,” or “I’m stuck in this relationship right now,” or “I’ve invested too much into it to just end it,” or even just not wanting to wait patiently for the man God has intended to come along. We women can be too hasty. But patience, patience, patience…a prayer for each one of us to strive towards. A prayer for myself. What an important quality to have! Because honestly, by being patient for the man who God has, you are saying, “OK God, I realize, first-that You are God, secondly-Your plan, will for my life, is more important and desirous for me to follow, that I am willing and only desirous of waiting, because I know I will only mess it up. I trust You, my God, knowing all things, including what man you would bless me with to ultimatley bring You the most glory! So because of that, I wait.”
    Cameron, I think it is awesome that you have chosen to talk about this, and I believe you have done it well! I pray many women will find this site.

  4. Thank you.

  5. Hey Cameron,

    I really like your commentary, very well thought out and accurate.

    It really gave me some things to ponder!

  6. Excellent to hear Craig. 🙂

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